MOSES GAVE THE LAW OF GOD CONCERNING DIVORCE TO THE CHILDREN OF ISRAEL.

Deuteronomy 24:1-4 NIV If a man marries a woman who becomes displeasing to him
because he finds something indecent about her, and he writes her a certificate of divorce, gives it to her and sends her from his house, and if after she leaves his house she becomes the wife of another man, and her second husband dislikes her and writes her a certificate of divorce, gives it to her and sends her from his house, or if he dies, then her first husband, who divorced her, is not allowed to marry her again after she has been defiled. That would be detestable in the eyes of the LORD. Do not bring sin upon the land the LORD your God is giving you as an inheritance.

Jeremiah 3:1 NIV "If a man divorces his wife and she leaves him and marries another man, should he return to her again? Would not the land be completely defiled? But you have lived as a prostitute with many lovers-- would you now return to me?" declares the LORD.

GOD SAID THAT IF A MAN DESIRED TO DIVORCE A WOMAN HE COULD WRITE HER A BILL OF DIVORCEMENT AND SEND HER FROM HIS HOUSE, AND BOTH HE AND SHE WERE FREE TO MARRY ANOTHER PERSON. GOD ALSO DECREED THAT ONCE A WOMAN HAD MARRIED AGAIN, THE FIRST HUSBAND COULD NOT REMARRY HER EVEN IF HER SECOND HUSBAND DIVORCED HER OR DIED.  EVEN THOUGH GOD PERMITTED DIVORCE, HE WAS NOT SANCTIONING IT FOR ANY FRIVOLOUS REASON. CONTINUAL ADULTERY WAS INTENDED TO BE THE ONLY GROUNDS FOR DIVORCE.

ALL OF THE VERSES BELOW PERTAIN TO SPIRITUAL ADULTERY, ISRAEL’S SINS OF WORSHIPPING IDOLS.

Jeremiah 3:20 NIV But like a woman unfaithful to her husband, so you have been unfaithful to me, O house of Israel," declares the LORD.

Ezekiel 16:32 NIV  "'You adulterous wife! You prefer strangers to your own husband!

Ezekiel 16:45 NIV You are a true daughter of your mother, who despised her husband and her children; and you are a true sister of your sisters, who despised their husbands and their children.

Hosea 2:2 NIV  "Rebuke your mother, rebuke her, for she is not my wife, and I am not her husband. Let her remove the adulterous look from her face and the unfaithfulness from between her breasts.

Hosea 2:7 NIV She will chase after her lovers but not catch them; she will look for them but not find them. Then she will say, 'I will go back to my husband as at first, for then I was better off than now.'

Hosea 2:16 NIV "In that day," declares the LORD, "you will call me 'my husband'; you will no longer call me 'my master. '

THROUGHOUT THE BIBLE ADULTERY IS USED AS AN EXAMPLE OF PEOPLE WHO WORSHIP IDOLS. PART OF THE SANCTITY OF MARRIAGE LIES IN THE FACT THAT IT IS A SPIRITUAL PICTURE OF HOW GOD CONSIDERS HIS DEALINGS WITH HUMAN BEINGS.    

Malachi 2:13-15 NIV Another thing you do: You flood the Lord's altar with tears. You weep and wail because he no longer pays attention to your offerings or accepts them with pleasure from your hands. You ask, "Why?" It is because the LORD is acting as the witness between you and the wife of your youth, because you have broken faith with her, though she is your partner, the wife of your marriage covenant. Has not the LORD made them one? In flesh and spirit they are his. And why one? Because he was seeking godly offspring. So guard yourself in your spirit, and do not break faith with the wife of your youth.

GOD TOLD THE JEWS THROUGH THE PROPHET MALACHI, THAT ONE OF THE REASONS HE WOULD NOT ACCEPT THEIR OFFERINGS, ANSWER THEIR PRAYERS, AND BLESS THEIR NATION AS HE HAD IN THE PAST, WAS BECAUSE OF THEIR WIDESPREAD PRACTICE OF DIVORCE.

GOD GAVE MOSES THE LAW CONCERNING DIVORCE BECAUSE HE KNOWS THAT THERE ARE SOME CASES WHERE KEEPING A MARRIAGE TOGETHER IS JUST NOT FEASIBLE. THIS LAW CONCERNING DIVORCE WAS NOT INTENDED BY GOD TO BE USED CASUALLY, BUT ONLY AS A LAST RESORT, WHEN A MARRIAGE WAS TOTALLY BEYOND SAVING.

ALSO NOTICE IN THE VERSE ABOVE THAT WHAT GOD DESIRES FROM A MARRIAGE IS CHILDREN BROUGHT UP TO HAVE FAITH IN GOD.

Malachi 2:16 NIV "I hate divorce," says the LORD God of Israel, "and I hate a man's covering himself with violence as well as with his garment," says the LORD Almighty. So guard yourself in your spirit, and do not break faith.

GOD SAYS THAT HE HATES DIVORCE, AND HE HATES VIOLENCE.  WE HERE IN THE UNITED STATES ARE GUILTY OF DOING THESE VERY SAME THINGS THAT GOD REBUKED THE ISRAELITES FOR TWENTY FIVE HUNDRED YEARS AGO.  OUR DIVORCE RATE AND VIOLENT CRIME ARE GOING TO BRING THE PUNISHMENT OF GOD DOWN UPON OUR NATION.

THE RESULTS OF DIVORCE AND CRIME ARE BAD ENOUGH THEMSELVES WITHOUT GOD’S WRATH ADDED TO THEM, SO WE MUST HOPE OUR NATION CAN REVERSE THESE TRENDS.

EVEN THOUGH GOD HATES DIVORCE AND VIOLENCE, HE HIMSELF USES THESE TOOLS WHEN IT BECOMES NECESSARY.

GOD SPLIT THE NATION OF ISRAEL INTO TWO PARTS DURING THE REIGN OF SOLOMON, AND CAST OFF ONE PART. GOD, IN A SPIRITUAL SENSE, IS DIVORCED. ONE NATION HE CALLED JUDAH, AND THE OTHER HE CALLED ISRAEL. HE CHARACTERIZES THEM IN THE SCRIPTURES AS TWO SISTERS MARRIED TO ONE MAN AND BOTH ARE UNFAITHFUL TO THEIR HUSBAND. 

Jeremiah 3:6 NIV During the reign of King Josiah, the LORD said to me, " Have you seen what faithless Israel has done? She has gone up on every high hill and under every spreading tree and has committed adultery there.

Jeremiah 3:8 NIV I gave faithless Israel her certificate of divorce and sent her away because of all her adulteries. Yet I saw that her unfaithful sister Judah had no fear; she also went out and committed adultery.

GOD HATES DIVORCE, BUT, HE HAD ALSO DECREED IN HIS WORD THAT HE WOULD ONLY FORGIVE ISRAEL’S NATIONAL SINS, THEIR SPIRITUAL ADULTERY OF WORSHIPPING OTHER GODS AND IDOLS, SIX TIMES, AND THE SEVENTH TIME HE WOULD CAST HER AWAY FROM HIM, AND DIVORCE HER, WHICH HE DID.

GOD DIVORCED THE HOUSE OF ISRAEL, IN 721 B.C., AND THEY WERE CARRIED OFF TO ASSYRIA.

Jeremiah 3:9-11 NIV Because Israel's immorality mattered so little to her, she defiled the land and committed adultery with stone and wood. In spite of all this, her unfaithful sister Judah did not return to me with all her heart, but only in pretense," declares the LORD. The LORD said to me, "Faithless Israel is more righteous than unfaithful Judah.

MARRIAGE AND DIVORCE IN GODS EYES IS A PICTURE OF HOW HE DEALS WITH THE NATIONS, ESPECIALLY HIS TWO CHOSEN NATIONS, JUDAH AND ISRAEL. GOD DIVORCED ISRAEL AND YET EVEN AFTER THE KINGDOM OF JUDAH HAD SEEN WHAT GOD HAD DONE TO HER SISTER ISRAEL, AFTER HE HAD DESTROYED THEIR NATION AND SENT THEM OFF INTO CAPTIVITY, JUDAH STILL DID NOT REPENT AND WORSHIP THE TRUE GOD, BUT CONTINUED TO WORSHIP IDOLS.

Isaiah 50:1 NIV This is what the LORD says: "Where is your mother's certificate of divorce with which I sent her away? Or to which of my creditors did I sell you? Because of your sins you were sold; because of your transgressions your mother was sent away.

GOD NEVER DID DIVORCE JUDAH, EVEN THOUGH THEY WERE SCATTERED AFTER THEY REJECTED CHRIST, GOD HAS NOT DIVORCED THEM TO THIS DAY.  GOD DIVORCED ISRAEL, THE LOST TRIBES, BUT HE IS STILL MARRIED TO JUDAH. JUDAH’S PUNISHMENT WAS TWO THOUSAND YEARS OF WANDERING, TWO THOUSAND YEARS OF SPIRITUAL WHOREDOM BEFORE GOD WOULD FORGIVE HER AND GATHER HER BACK TO HIS LAND, WHICH HE IS DOING TODAY.

Jeremiah 3:12-15 NIV Go, proclaim this message toward the north: "'Return, faithless Israel,' declares the LORD, 'I will frown on you no longer, for I am merciful,' declares the LORD, 'I will not be angry forever. Only acknowledge your guilt-- you have rebelled against the LORD your God, you have scattered your favors to foreign gods under every spreading tree, and have not obeyed me,'" declares the LORD.  "Return, faithless people," declares the LORD, "for I am your husband. I will choose you--one from a town and two from a clan--and bring you to Zion. Then I will give you shepherds after my own heart, who will lead you with knowledge and understanding.

GOD HAD A PROBLEM, HE HAD SET THE PRECEDENT IN HIS WORD THAT A DIVORCED MAN COULD NOT REMARRY THE SAME WOMAN AFTER HE HAD DIVORCED HER AND SHE HAD MARRIED ANOTHER. 

1 Corinthians 7:39 NIV A woman is bound to her husband as long as he lives. But if her husband dies, she is free to marry anyone she wishes, but he must belong to the Lord.

THE ISRAELITES HAD MARRIED THEIR FALSE GODS, THEIR IDOLS, AFTER HE HAD DIVORCED THEM. BUT, GOD HAD GIVEN A PROPHECY THAT HE WOULD SOMEDAY FORGIVE ISRAEL AND BRING HER BACK AS HIS WIFE. HOW COULD HE DO THIS? NO PROBLEM FOR GOD. CHRIST, THE CREATOR, SIMPLY DIED HIMSELF, AND WHEN HE WAS RESURRECTED FROM THE DEAD HE HAD THE RIGHT TO AGAIN PICK UP HIS DEALINGS WITH THE LOST TRIBES, WHOM HE DIVORCED, BECAUSE DEATH FREES A PERSON FROM THE BONDS OF MARRIAGE.

THE GROUNDS FOR DIVORCE

CHRIST TELLS US WHAT THE GROUNDS FOR DIVORCE ARE. CONTINUAL, UNSTOPPABLE ADULTERY IS THE ONLY LEGAL GROUND FOR DIVORCE THAT GOD RECOGNIZES.

Matthew 5:31-32 NIV "It has been said, 'Anyone who divorces his wife must give her a certificate of divorce.' But I tell you that anyone who divorces his wife, except for marital unfaithfulness, causes her to become an adulteress, and anyone who marries the divorced woman commits adultery.

Matthew 19:3-12 NIV Some Pharisees came to him to test him. They asked, "Is it lawful for a man to divorce his wife for any and every reason?"  "Haven't you read," he replied, "that at the beginning the Creator 'made them male and female,' and said, 'For this reason a man will leave his father and mother and be united to his wife, and the two will become one flesh' ? So they are no longer two, but one. Therefore what God has joined together, let man not separate."  "Why then," they asked, "did Moses command that a man give his wife a certificate of divorce and send her away?" Jesus replied, "Moses permitted you to divorce your wives because your hearts were hard. But it was not this way from the beginning.

Matthew 19:9-12 NIV I tell you that anyone who divorces his wife, except for marital unfaithfulness, and marries another woman commits adultery." The disciples said to him, "If this is the situation between a husband and wife, it is better not to marry." Jesus replied, "Not everyone can accept this word, but only those to whom it has been given. For some are eunuchs because they were born that way; others were made that way by men; and others have renounced marriage because of the kingdom of heaven.
The one who can accept this should accept it."

Mark 10:11-12 He answered, "Anyone who divorces his wife and marries another woman commits adultery against her. And if she divorces her husband and marries another man, she commits adultery."

DIVORCE, EXCEPT FOR THE CAUSE OF ADULTERY, IS A SIN. NOW THIS DOES NOT MEAN THAT EVERYONE WHO IS DIVORCED AND REMARRIED IS LIVING IN SIN, AND SHOULD SEPARATE. THIS WOULD BE ANOTHER SIN, THE BREAKING OF YET ANOTHER CONTRACT.

Acts 17:30  In the past God overlooked such ignorance, but now he commands all people everywhere to repent.

GOD DOES NOT HOLD US RESPONSIBLE FOR WHAT WE HAVE DONE IN THE PAST, IN OUR IGNORANCE, AND HE WILL FORGIVE US FOR THE SIN OF DIVORCE JUST AS EASILY AS ANY OTHER SIN.

ONCE YOU KNOW WHAT GOD EXPECTS HOWEVER, YOU ARE RESPONSIBLE TO LIVE ACCORDING TO HIS COMMANDS. IF YOU HAVE FAITH IN GOD AND THE KNOWLEDGE OF WHAT HE EXPECTS AND ARE THINKING ABOUT OBTAINING A DIVORCE FOR ANY OTHER REASON THAN THE CONTINUED ADULTERY OF YOUR MARRIAGE PARTNER, BE FOREWARNED, GOD MAY MAKE YOUR NEXT MARRIAGE EVEN MORE MISERABLE THAN THE ONE YOU ARE IN NOW.  THOSE WHOM GOD LOVES, HE CHASTENS WHEN THEY SIN WILLFULLY AND KNOWINGLY.

1 Corinthians 7:1-2 NIV Now for the matters you wrote about: It is good for a man not to marry. But since there is so much immorality, each man should have his own wife, and each woman her own husband.

1 Corinthians 7:7-9 NIV I wish that all men were as I am. But each man has his own gift from God; one has this gift, another has that. Now to the unmarried and the widows I say: It is good for them to stay unmarried, as I am. But if they cannot control themselves, they should marry, for it is better to marry than to burn with passion.

PAUL TAUGHT THAT IT WAS GOOD FOR A PERSON NOT TO MARRY IF THEY HAD CONTROL OVER THEIR SEXUAL DESIRES.  IF NOT, THEN THEY SHOULD MARRY.

1 Corinthians 7:3-5 NIV The husband should fulfill his marital duty to his wife, and likewise the wife to her husband. The wife's body does not belong to her alone but also to her husband. In the same way, the husband's body does not belong to him alone but also to his wife. Do not deprive each other except by mutual consent and for a time, so that you may devote yourselves to prayer. Then come together again so that Satan will not tempt you because of your lack of self-control.

PAUL ALSO TAUGHT THAT THOSE WHO ARE MARRIED SHOULD NOT DEPRIVE EACH OTHER OF THEIR MARITAL RIGHTS.  HE TAUGHT THAT THE WIFE’S BODY BELONGED TO THE HUSBAND, AND THE HUSBANDS BODY BELONGED TO THE WIFE.  IN MARRIAGE, EACH PARTNER HAS RIGHTS TO THEIR SPOUSES BODY.

MARITAL UNFAITHFULNESS MAY ALSO INCLUDE THE REFUSAL OF ONE PARTNER TO RENDER TO THE OTHER PARTNER THEIR MARITAL RIGHT, SEXUAL INTERCOURSE. A REFUSAL BY ONE PARTNER TO PROVIDE THEIR SPOUSE WITH THE PHYSICAL RIGHTS OF MARRIAGE HAS THE EFFECT OF FORCING THE OTHER TO COMMIT ADULTERY.  THE GUILT FOR THIS LIES WITH THE REFUSING PARTNER.  REFUSAL BY ONE PARTNER TO MEET THE PHYSICAL NEEDS OF THE OTHER IS IN EFFECT ADULTERY, AND POSSIBLY GROUNDS FOR DIVORCE.

NOW THIS DOES NOT MEAN THAT A PERSON HAS TO SAY YES EVERY TIME THE OTHER PERSON HAS A DESIRE. SEXUAL INTERCOURSE IS LIKE WORSHIP, ONE OCCURRENCE PER WEEK, THREE TIMES A MONTH IS ENOUGH TO MAINTAIN THE MARRIAGE. I SAY THREE TIMES A MONTH BECAUSE GOD, IN THE OLD TESTAMENT COMMANDED PEOPLE TO ABSTAIN FROM SEXUAL INTERCOURSE DURING THE TIME OF A WOMAN’S MONTHLY CYCLE.

THIS IS NOT A COMMAND TO HOLD IT DOWN TO THIS AMOUNT, MARRIED COUPLES MAY ENJOY EACH OTHER AS MUCH AS THEY MUTUALLY DESIRE. THIS IS ONLY A MINIMUM STANDARD SET TO ASSURE THAT A PERSON IS NOT GUILTY OF VIOLATING THE MARRIAGE CONTRACT AND FORCING THE OTHER PERSON TO FIND SEXUAL FULFILLMENT ELSEWHERE.

I MENTION THIS BECAUSE THERE ARE SOME PEOPLE WHO TREAT THEIR SPOUSES BADLY, REFUSE SEXUAL INTERCOURSE TO THEIR PARTNER, AND THEN SAY, “IT WASN’T MY FAULT” I DIDN’T FILE FOR THE DIVORCE.”

1 Corinthians 7:10-11 NIV To the married I give this command (not I, but the Lord): A wife must not separate from her husband. But if she does, she must remain unmarried or else be reconciled to her husband. And a husband must not divorce his wife.

PAUL TAUGHT THAT IF A PERSON DESIRES A DIVORCE AFTER COMING TO FAITH IN CHRIST, (FOR A REASON OTHER THAN INFIDELITY) THEN THEY MUST BE SURE IN THEIR OWN MIND THAT THEY WILL HAVE CONTROL OVER THEIR OWN BODY AND REMAIN UNMARRIED WITHOUT COMMITTING SEXUAL IMMORALITY. 

1 Corinthians 7:12-13 NIV To the rest I say this (I, not the Lord): If any brother has a wife who is not a believer and she is willing to live with him, he must not divorce her.
And if a woman has a husband who is not a believer and he is willing to live with her, she must not divorce him.

IF ONE PERSON COMES TO FAITH IN CHRIST AFTER THEY ARE ALREADY MARRIED TO AN UNBELIEVER THEN THEY MUST NOT SEPARATE FROM THEIR SPOUSE AS LONG AS THE OTHER PERSON IS CONTENT TO STAY TOGETHER. 

1 Corinthians 7:15 NIV But if the unbeliever leaves, let him do so. A believing man or woman is not bound in such circumstances; God has called us to live in peace.

IF THE UNBELIEVING PARTNER LEAVES THEN THE BELIEVER IS NOT BOUND IN SUCH A CASE, THEY ARE FREE TO REMARRY, BUT ONLY TO ANOTHER BELIEVER, AND THIS MARRIAGE IS PERMANENT UNTIL THE DEATH OF ONE OF THEM.

Romans 7:2-3 NIV For example, by law a married woman is bound to her husband as long as he is alive, but if her husband dies, she is released from the law of marriage. So then, if she marries another man while her husband is still alive, she is called an adulteress. But if her husband dies, she is released from that law and is not an adulteress, even though she marries another man.

IF ONE OF THE PARTNERS IN A MARRIAGE DIES, THE SURVIVOR HAS THE RIGHT TO REMARRY, BUT AGAIN, ONLY TO ANOTHER BELIEVER.

1 Corinthians 7:17 & 20 NIV Nevertheless, each one should retain the place in life that the Lord assigned to him and to which God has called him. This is the rule I lay down in all the churches. Each one should remain in the situation which he was in when God called him.

1 Corinthians 7:24 & 27-28 NIV Brothers, each man, as responsible to God, should remain in the situation God called him to. Are you married? Do not seek a divorce. Are you unmarried? Do not look for a wife. But if you do marry, you have not sinned; and if a virgin marries, she has not sinned. But those who marry will face many troubles in this life, and I want to spare you this.

PAUL TAUGHT THAT EACH PERSON SHOULD REMAIN IN THE SITUATION THEY WERE IN WHEN THEY WERE CALLED BY GOD, BUT IF THEY DESIRED TO MARRY IT IS NO SIN.

THOSE WHO ARE LIVING TOGETHER OR SLEEPING WITH SOMEONE THEY ARE NOT MARRIED OR ENGAGED TO, HAVE A CHOICE TO MAKE.  THEY CAN EITHER MARRY OR SEPARATE TOTALLY. IF BOTH PERSONS IN A RELATIONSHIP COME TO FAITH IN CHRIST AND ARE BELIEVERS THEN IN MOST CASES IT IS PROBABLY BEST TO MARRY.  IF ONE PERSON HAS BECOME A CHRISTIAN AND THE OTHER HAS NOT, THEN TOTAL SEPARATION IS THE BEST THING TO
DO.

2 Corinthians 6:14-16 & 18 NIV Do not be yoked together with unbelievers. For what do righteousness and wickedness have in common? Or what fellowship can light have with darkness? What harmony is there between Christ and Belial ? What does a believer have in common with an unbeliever? What agreement is there between the temple of God and idols? For we are the temple of the living God. As God has said: "I will live with them and walk among them, and I will be their God, and they will be my people."
 "I will be a Father to you, and you will be my sons and daughters, says the Lord Almighty."

2 Corinthians 7:1 NIV Since we have these promises, dear friends, let us purify ourselves from everything that contaminates body and spirit, perfecting holiness out of reverence for God.

GOD HAS COMMANDED US NOT TO BE UNEQUALLY YOKED TOGETHER WITH UNBELIEVERS. THIS COMMAND FORBIDS MIXED MARRIAGES, A BELIEVER TO AN UNBELIEVER. TWO BELIEVERS MAY MARRY, AND TWO UNBELIEVERS MAY MARRY, BUT NOT ONE OF EACH. MIXED MARRIAGES HAVE MANY PROBLEMS BECAUSE ONE PARTNERS MIND IS SET ON SPIRITUAL THINGS, WHILE THE OTHER PARTNERS MIND IS SET ON MATERIAL THINGS, THE THINGS OF THIS WORLD. 

1 Corinthians 7:32-35 NIV I would like you to be free from concern. An unmarried man is concerned about the Lord's affairs--how he can please the Lord. But a married man is concerned about the affairs of this world--how he can please his wife-- and his interests are divided. An unmarried woman or virgin is concerned about the Lord's affairs: Her aim is to be devoted to the Lord in both body and spirit. But a married woman is concerned about the affairs of this world--how she can please her husband.
I am saying this for your own good, not to restrict you, but that you may live in a right way in undivided devotion to the Lord.

PAUL TAUGHT THAT IF A PERSON HAD SELF CONTROL THEY WOULD BE BETTER ABLE TO SERVE THE LORD BEING SINGLE.  THIS IS IN NO WAY A COMMAND NOT TO MARRY, ONLY ADVICE TO THOSE WHO HAVE THEIR BODIES FULLY UNDER CONTROL.                   

1 Corinthians 7:36-38 If anyone thinks he is acting improperly toward the virgin he is engaged to, and if she is getting along in years and he feels he ought to marry, he should do as he wants. He is not sinning. They should get married. But the man who has settled the matter in his own mind, who is under no compulsion but has control over his own will, and who has made up his mind not to marry the virgin--this man also does the right thing. So then, he who marries the virgin does right, but he who does not marry her does even better.

ANYONE WHO HAS A STRONG SEXUAL DESIRE SHOULD BE MARRIED.

TO A PERSON WHO IS ALREADY MARRIED BUT IN A MISERABLE ONE, YOU SHOULD BEAR IT AS LONG AS POSSIBLE, AND PRAY FOR THE CONVERSION OF THE PARTNER WHO IS MISTREATING YOU. GOD IS FULLY ABLE TO CHANGE THE PERSON YOU ARE MARRIED TO, OR CAUSE THEIR DEATH.  YOU SHOULD NOT PRAY FOR THEIR DEATH, BUT CONTINUE TO BE KIND TO THAT PERSON UNTIL GOD DOES ONE THING OR THE OTHER FOR YOU.

AS AN EXAMPLE WE WILL LOOK AT THE DOINGS OF ABIGAIL, WHO PROTECTED HER EVIL HUSBAND, AND WAS REWARDED BY GOD FOR IT WITH HIS DEATH, AND SHE WAS THEN MARRIED TO DAVID, WHO WAS TO BECOME THE KING OF ISRAEL.

1 Samuel 25:2-12 NIV A certain man in Maon, who had property there at Carmel, was very wealthy. He had a thousand goats and three thousand sheep, which he was shearing in Carmel. His name was Nabal and his wife's name was Abigail. She was an intelligent and beautiful woman, but her husband, a Calebite, was surly and mean in his dealings. While David was in the desert, he heard that Nabal was shearing sheep. So he sent ten young men and said to them, "Go up to Nabal at Carmel and greet him in my name. Say to him: 'Long life to you! Good health to you and your household! And good health to all that is yours!  "'Now I hear that it is sheep-shearing time. When your shepherds were with us, we did not mistreat them, and the whole time they were at Carmel nothing of theirs was missing. Ask your own servants and they will tell you. Therefore be favorable toward my young men, since we come at a festive time. Please give your servants and your son David whatever you can find for them.'" When David's men arrived, they gave Nabal this message in David's name. Then they waited. Nabal answered David's servants, "Who is this David? Who is this son of Jesse? Many servants are breaking away from their masters these days. Why should I take my bread and water, and the meat I have slaughtered for my shearers, and give it to men coming from who knows where?" David's men turned around and went back. When they arrived, they reported every word.

1 Samuel 25:13-28 NIV David said to his men, "Put on your swords!" So they put on their swords, and David put on his. About four hundred men went up with David, while two hundred stayed with the supplies. One of the servants told Nabal's wife Abigail: "David sent messengers from the desert to give our master his greetings, but he hurled insults at them. Yet these men were very good to us. They did not mistreat us, and the whole time we were out in the fields near them nothing was missing. Night and day they were a wall around us all the time we were herding our sheep near them. Now think it over and see what you can do, because disaster is hanging over our master and his whole household. He is such a wicked man that no one can talk to him." Abigail lost no time. She took two hundred loaves of bread, two skins of wine, five dressed sheep, five seahs of roasted grain, a hundred cakes of raisins and two hundred cakes of pressed figs, and loaded them on donkeys. Then she told her servants, "Go on ahead; I'll follow you." But she did not tell her husband Nabal. As she came riding her donkey into a mountain ravine, there were David and his men descending toward her, and she met them. David had just said, "It's been useless--all my watching over this fellow's property in the desert so that nothing of his was missing. He has paid me back evil for good. May God deal with David, be it ever so severely, if by morning I leave alive one male of all who belong to him!" When Abigail saw David, she quickly got off her donkey and bowed down before David with her face to the ground. She fell at his feet and said: "My lord, let the blame be on me alone. Please let your servant speak to you; hear what your servant has to say. May my lord pay no attention to that wicked man Nabal. He is just like his name--his name is Fool, and folly goes with him. But as for me, your servant, I did not see the men my master sent.  "Now since the LORD has kept you, my master, from bloodshed and from avenging yourself with your own hands, as surely as the LORD lives and as you live, may your enemies and all who intend to harm my master be like Nabal. And let this gift, which your servant has brought to my master, be given to the men who follow you. Please forgive your servant's offense, for the LORD will certainly make a lasting dynasty for my master, because he fights the Lord's battles. Let no wrongdoing be found in you as long as you live.

1 Samuel 25:32-42 NIV David said to Abigail, "Praise be to the LORD, the God of Israel, who has sent you today to meet me. May you be blessed for your good judgment and for keeping me from bloodshed this day and from avenging myself with my own hands. Otherwise, as surely as the LORD, the God of Israel, lives, who has kept me from harming you, if you had not come quickly to meet me, not one male belonging to Nabal would have been left alive by daybreak." Then David accepted from her hand what she had brought him and said, "Go home in peace. I have heard your words and granted your request." When Abigail went to Nabal, he was in the house holding a banquet like that of a king. He was in high spirits and very drunk. So she told him nothing until daybreak. Then in the morning, when Nabal was sober, his wife told him all these things, and his heart failed him and he became like a stone. About ten days later, the LORD struck Nabal and he died. When David heard that Nabal was dead, he said, "Praise be to the LORD, who has upheld my cause against Nabal for treating me with contempt. He has kept his servant from doing wrong and has brought Nabal's wrongdoing down on his own head." Then David sent word to Abigail, asking her to become his wife. His servants went to Carmel and said to Abigail, "David has sent us to you to take you to become his wife." She bowed down with her face to the ground and said, "Here is your maidservant, ready to serve you and wash the feet of my master's servants." Abigail quickly got on a donkey and, attended by her five maids, went with David's messengers and became his wife.

IT WAS THE LORD WHO STRUCK THIS EVIL MAN, NABAL, WITH A HEART ATTACK SO HE DIED, AND HIS WIFE ABIGAIL, WHO WAS BOTH BEAUTIFUL AND INTELLIGENT WAS FREE TO BECOME DAVID’S WIFE.  IF SHE HAD LEFT HER HUSBAND BEFORE THIS EVENT HAPPENED, SHE WOULD NOT HAVE BEEN IN THE RIGHT PLACE AT THE RIGHT TIME TO MEET DAVID, THE FUTURE KING OF ISRAEL, AND BECOME HIS WIFE. THE LORD BLESSED ABIGAIL FOR PUTTING UP THIS EVIL MAN FOR AS LONG AS THEY WERE MARRIED, AND HE FINALLY
FREED HER FROM HIM.

THE PARTNERS IN A MARRIAGE SHOULD BE KIND AND FORGIVING TO ONE ANOTHER.  ONE ACT OF ADULTERY IS NOT GROUNDS FOR DIVORCE IF THE OTHER PERSON ASKS THEIR SPOUSE TO FORGIVE THEM. ONLY PERPETUAL ADULTERY, WITHOUT REPENTANCE IS GROUNDS FOR DIVORCE, FROM GODS VIEWPOINT.

Ephesians 4:32 NIV Be kind and compassionate to one another, forgiving each other, just as in Christ God forgave you.

Ephesians 5:21 NIV Submit to one another out of reverence for Christ.

WIVES SHOULD SUBMIT TO THEIR HUSBANDS, AND HER HUSBAND SHOULD SUBMIT TO CHRIST.

Ephesians 5:22-24 NIV Wives, submit to your husbands as to the Lord. For the husband is the head of the wife as Christ is the head of the church, his body, of which he is the Savior. Now as the church submits to Christ, so also wives should submit to their husbands in everything.

MANY MEN HAVE USED THESE VERSES DOWN THROUGH THE CENTURIES TO TRY TO MAKE THEIR WIVES FEEL GUILTY IF THEY DO NOT OBEY THE HUSBAND LIKE A SLAVE. THIS IS NOT THE INTENTION OF GOD, TO MAKE THE WIFE A SLAVE.  ANY MAN WHO EXPECTS HIS WIFE TO OBEY HIM MUST DO WHAT FOLLOWS THIS COMMAND TO WIVES, THE COMMAND FOR THE HUSBANDS.
            
Ephesians 5:25 NIV Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her

Ephesians 5:28-30 NIV In this same way, husbands ought to love their wives as their own bodies. He who loves his wife loves himself. After all, no one ever hated his own body, but he feeds and cares for it, just as Christ does the church--for we are members of his body.

Ephesians 5:33 NIV However, each one of you also must love his wife as he loves himself, and the wife must respect her husband.

ANY HUSBAND WHO EXPECTS HIS WIFE TO OBEY HIM IN ALL THINGS, MUST HIMSELF BE WILLING TO GIVE HIS LIFE FOR HIS WIFE, AND BE OBEDIENT TO CHRIST IN ALL THINGS, AND LOVE HIS WIFE AS HE LOVES HIS OWN BODY. IF A MAN DOES THIS THEN HE WILL NOT TREAT HIS WIFE IN A MANNER THE HE HIMSELF WOULD NOT WANT TO BE TREATED IF THE ROLES WERE REVERSED.

A MAN WHO EXPECTS HIS WIFE TO FOLLOW THE WORD OF GOD, MUST FOLLOW IT HIMSELF AND LOVE HIS WIFE AS MUCH AS HE LOVES HIMSELF, AND TREAT HER ACCORDINGLY.

Ephesians 5:31-32 NIV "For this reason a man will leave his father and mother and be united to his wife, and the two will become one flesh." This is a profound mystery--but I am talking about Christ and the church.

PAUL UNDERSTOOD THE MYSTERY OF WHAT MARRIAGE SIGNIFIES, THE UNION OF CHRIST TO THE CHURCH AT THE FIRST RESURRECTION, WHEN ALL BELIEVERS WILL BE UNITED TO GOD IN OUR NEW AND PERFECT BODIES.

THE MYSTERY THAT PAUL WAS TALKING ABOUT IS THE FACT THAT THE CHURCH, THE SAVED OF ALL AGES IS CALLED IN THE SCRIPTURES, "THE BRIDE OF CHRIST," AND "THE WIFE OF THE LAMB."

Revelation 21:9 NIV One of the seven angels who had the seven bowls full of the seven last plagues came and said to me, "Come, I will show you the bride, the wife of the Lamb."

Revelation 19:7-9 Let us rejoice and be glad and give him glory! For the wedding of the Lamb has come, and his bride has made herself ready. Fine linen, bright and clean, was given her to wear." (Fine linen stands for the righteous acts of the saints.) Then the angel said to me, "Write: 'Blessed are those who are invited to the wedding supper of the Lamb!'" And he added, "These are the true words of God."

Revelation 21:2-4 NIV I saw the Holy City, the new Jerusalem, coming down out of heaven from God, prepared as a bride beautifully dressed for her husband. And I heard a loud voice from the throne saying, "Now the dwelling of God is with men, and he will live with them. They will be his people, and God himself will be with them and be their God. He will wipe every tear from their eyes. There will be no more death or mourning or crying or pain, for the old order of things has passed away."

HUMAN MARRIAGE SYMBOLIZES THE TIME WHEN GOD AND MEN WILL DWELL TOGETHER IN PERFECT UNITY AFTER THE RETURN OF CHRIST.
CHILDREN

PAUL, IN EPHESIANS, THEN GOES ON AND GIVES COMMANDS FOR BRINGING  UP CHILDREN.

Ephesians 6:1-4 NIV Children, obey your parents in the Lord, for this is right. "Honor your father and mother"--which is the first commandment with a promise--  "that it may go well with you and that you may enjoy long life on the earth." Fathers, do not exasperate your children; instead, bring them up in the training and instruction of the Lord.

GOD IS A GOD WHO BELIEVES IN ORDER AND IN THE CHAIN OF COMMAND.  GOD THE FATHER IS OVER CHRIST, CHRIST IS OVER THE ANGELS AND MEN, MEN ARE OVER THEIR WIVES, AND THE WIVES ARE OVER THE CHILDREN.  ALL HUMANS ARE OVER THE ANIMALS. THIS IS THE ORDER THAT GOD EXPECTS US TO ADHERE TO WHILE WE ARE ALIVE ON THIS EARTH.

Luke 20:34-35 NIV Jesus replied, "The people of this age marry and are given in marriage. But those who are considered worthy of taking part in that age and in the resurrection from the dead will neither marry nor be given in marriage,

Mark 12:25 NIV When the dead rise, they will neither marry nor be given in marriage; they will be like the angels in heaven.

AT THE RESURRECTION THERE WILL BE NO MALE OR FEMALE BEINGS, WE WILL ALL BE MADE EQUAL TO THE ANGELS, BUT WHILE WE ARE HERE ON THIS EARTH WE ARE TO LIVE ACCORDING TO THE COMMANDS OF GOD FOR WHATEVER TYPE OF BODY HE SAW FIT TO PUT US INTO.  TO DO THIS IS PLEASING TO GOD AND EARNS REWARDS AT THE JUDGMENT SEAT OF CHRIST.

IF YOU ARE IN A MARRIAGE THAT IS TOTALLY UNBEARABLE OR ARE AN ABUSED SPOUSE, THEN YOU MAY BE FORCED TO LIVE SEPARATELY FROM YOUR SPOUSE UNTIL GOD SOLVES THE PROBLEM. BUT, DO NOT PLAN TO DIVORCE AND REMARRY UNTIL THE DEATH OF YOUR FIRST SPOUSE, UNLESS YOUR SPOUSE IS GUILTY OF CONTINUAL ADULTERY, OR COMPLETELY REFUSES TO GIVE YOU YOUR MARITAL RIGHTS, THROUGH NO FAULT OF YOUR OWN.